The Substitute Pizza

You know when you're craving something that is literally brimming with hot mozzarella and the tangy, mouth watering flavours of tomatoes and garlic? Maybe something to go on top of that? Button mushrooms? Bacon? MORE CHEESE?

Who am I kidding? Of course you know what that's like. That being said, it's slightly ironic that for me, that particular urge to put on an extra three kilos arrives at the end of the month, when I have just about 200 rupees in my pocket for the following 2 to 3 days.

I wanted that pizza today and I was prepared to do absolutely anything, no matter how outlandish or ridiculous. Then I realised - My thoughts were beginning to sound borderline crazy (as they do now, as well).

I walked into my kitchen and without even checking if I had all the necessary ingredients to whip up a pizza at home, I pulled out some flour and kneaded it.

And that's when it began...

Substitution #1
It wasn't long before I realised that I had no yeast to make the base even remotely fluffy. But I'm more of a traditional crispy - thin crust girl anyway. I didn't see that as too big of a roadblock. So, I folded some baking soda into the dough.

Substitution #2
One cold, stormy night, my parent's brought home a shiny, new microwave. It was beautiful. The only ridiculously unfortunate glitch in the matter is that they threw out our oven. So, since anything that goes into a microwave comes out dry and undercooked, I decided to put the pizza base in on convection mode for an extra ten minutes while I prepared the sauce.

Substitution #3
I opened the fridge and Lo, and Behold! We were out of tomatoes. BUT the can of readymade tomato puree sitting in the chiller allowed me to start breathing again. The sauce - I ground some garlic in the blender, because I wanted more flavour and less chunk. I then dropped a big dollop of the garlic paste into a pan, with a teaspoonful of butter and some finely chopped onions. Then came the substitute for fresh tomatoes, salt, pepper, chilli and a little lemon juice.

ANNOYING BEEP 1. ANNOYING BEEP 2. ANNOYING BEEP 3. ANNOYING BEEP 4. - The base was done. Or well, relatively steady, anyway.

Substitution #4 
Out comes the pizza base, the sauce goes on and the cheese... Oh, wait. Where's the cheese? Right. We had some cold, dry, grated mozzarella. Enough to feed an army... of ants. So the cheese went on anyway. But the empty spaces were a bit unpleasant to look at and damn it, I wanted more cheese! So I sprinkled tons of parmesean AND tore up a slice (Okay, two) of Brittania sandwich slice cheese and chopped up some sausages which I proceeded to recklessly dump on my pizza.

Back in the microwave. It cooked at 250 degrees for about 15 minutes.

And honestly? It wasn't half bad.

Ravioli alla Grancevola

I should probably explain the title before I begin. I haven't picked up any colloquial (or otherwise) Italian since my last post. My train of thought was simply derailed as it approached the idea of a title that is even remotely creative, and so I titled this blog "Ravioli alla Grancevola" which is the dish I ordered the other day at Spaghetti Kitchen, Gurgaon.

This is what it literally translates to:

Crabmeat Ravioli

Here's something you ought to know about me. I love Ravioli when its cooked right. But this dish was the one thing on the menu that screamed my name because it was inclusive of 3 of my favourite cooking ingredients - Seafood (or in this case, only the crabmeat), white wine and lots of butter.

Long story short, the ravioli blew me away. It was cooked perfectly - not leathery, not flimsy. The meat was tender and sweet, definitely not overpowered by the flavours of the white wine, butter and bechamel sauce, which complimented each other very well.

I wasn't alone on this little trip that I made to Spaghetti Kitchen. I was with a bunch of people. Very hungry people. So naturally, this wasn't the only dish I tried. Unfortunately, taking pictures of other people's food is frowned upon, so I didn't get any photographs, but I will do my level best to describe my experience to you without them. 

Here are some of the dishes that were on the table that night: 

• A large Pepperoni pizza
• Penne Carbonara
• Mediterranean Seafood Hotpot
• Grilled Pork Chops in a Mustard onion Gravy
• Penne with Vodka

We started off with a complimentary basket of assorted breads, with a choice of butter, balsamic vinegar and olive oil. 

(Fun fact: The combination of olive oil and balsamic vinegar smells like feet.)

The pizza was good. Thin crust, as salty as pepperoni ought to make it. Heavy enough for you to feel like you've eaten something, but not so heavy that you feel guilty or sick, after. The second pasta on the table however, was loaded enough to sink a ship. The penne Carbonara was overly cheesy for what is traditionally an egg sauce based pasta, but it didn't taste too bad. I'll give it that much.

The Mediterranean Seafood Hotpot was a mixed seafood dish. I've always been partial to seafood, and the tang that came with the fish, calamari, crabmeat and prawns won me over completely. The pork chops were also done well. The juicy meat went very well with the gentle mustard onion gravy which I remember referring to as 'a lullaby for the tummy.'

The Penne with Vodka is actually a house specialty at Spaghetti Kitchen. Its cooked in a tomato cream sauce, flamed with vodka and then sprinkled with a generous amount of parmesan cheese. Absolutely wonderful is all I can say. The flavours were powerful. It was as though they were throwing a party in my mouth. The Spaghetti Kitchen House specialty made it through with flying colours.

Spaghetti Kitchen is more of a family restaurant than anything else, but it wouldn't be completely inappropriate for a first date. It has a very welcoming ambience and is well lit, which I like because well... Being able to see your food is always a good thing. This wasn't the first time I visited the place, so I know that the ambience and service is good and also quite consistent. I'm not saying its silk - slippers  - English - butlers - diamond - cutlery fancy, but its cheerful and comfortable, which is good enough for me. 

So, here's how I rate the place on a scale of 1 to 5:

- Food: 4

- Ambience - 3.5

- Service - 3

Spaghetti Kitchen has three outlets in Delhi and NCR and a few in Mumbai, Pune, Kolkata, Bangalore and Chandigarh as well. If you're a fan of the Italian cuisine I would definitely recommend a visit.


Dinner Companionship: Family

That's all for now. If you're a foodie or you know anyone who is, feel free to follow this page or share it with your friends. Any form of feedback will also be appreciated. Hope you enjoyed reading. 

  

Tulips And Stuff

I know I eat at Kemps Corner a lot. My only excuse is that it can quite literally be considered student budget heaven. And with that confession out of the way, I'm going to proceed to write about Tulips, which is oh, I don't know - just another pseudo - italian restaurant, looking to find its place in town.

The thing with Tulips is that they love their herbs; be it basil, cilantro or thyme - they've got it covered.

These are the dishes I attempted to digest:

Basa fillet(s) in Cilantro and Lime

This dish was actually rather decent. The overpowering flavour of cilantro wasn't a put off as much as it was slightly unfortunate. The Basa fillets however, were cooked to perfection. I'm talking melt  in the mouth perfection. The herbed (surprise, surprise!) spaghetti was a pleasant addition. It was light and well seasoned - A little too much pepper though, but who am I to talk? I ordered steak in pepper sauce. But more on that tragedy later. What I found interesting about the combination of the fish and the pasta was that individually, they were both alright (and this may or may not be the north Indian in me who likes to mix everything on the plate talking), but together, they made a pretty good team. One that I'm not going to complain about too much. Then there was the stereotypical side salad, with diced onions, cucumber and bell peppers in lime, salt and pepper. It went pretty well with everything. I won't lie. Even if it was just a clever tactic to cover up the empty edge of the plate because the pale whiteness of it was just too depressing for them to be able to present to their customers who had been waiting for a good half an hour for the plate to show up in the first place. I could swear I developed a mild case of whiplash that day, from turning over and looking at the waiter every few minutes with a  desperately hungry expression on my face. Borderline Puss in Boots. No joke. 

On a scale of 1 to 5, I would give this dish a 3, which is honestly based more on the quantity than on the quality, and I get to be biased towards that aspect simply because I was EXTREMELY hungry at the time and the dish served my purpose in that respect. However, the fact that the fish was cooked so wonderfully, that being the highlight of the plate, earns it a few extra brownie points. 

Tenderloin Steak in Pepper sauce

This is where things went beyond wrong. I've actually ordered this steak before. The sauce is delicious, which is an interesting statement for me to make, since not I'm not really one to like anything that's too peppery. This time, however, my "medium rare" steak was burnt - Not just around the edges, but more along the lines of "left it on the grill and went to talk to my girlfriend" burnt. The side salad? Great. The fries? Even better! But what the hell were they thinking with the meat?! On being questioned, the only words the stunned attendant could manage to conjure were, "Ma'am, you said medium rare." So I figured, arguing wasn't going to help me here. I must confess, if you haven't figured already, I'm a complete carnivore, so I LIKE my meat sightly undercooked. Especially when it comes to steak, that partially raw centre is where all the flavour lies. So if you're going to over cook my meat, you might as well do it right and try not to burn it or leave it crunchy enough for me to taste nothing but the char on the curled edges. On a scale of 1 to 5? I'd say it earns about a 1 - and thats for the fries and the salad. As far as the sauce goes,  well let's just say it was better the last time I tried it and leave it at that. In fact, let's just not talk about the steak at all anymore and move on to dessert instead.

Chocolate covered Strawberry

The dessert selection at Tulips was quite intriguing, really. There was an array of pies, pastries and tarts to choose from (The apple pie looked particularly scrumptious), but being a strawberry lover on a student budget, I chose this little dynamite for 25 bucks a pop. Smooth chocolate, fresh strawberries, no complaints. It was awesome. 

So overall, here's what I learnt:

• Tulips didn't really make a spectacular impression on me, personally. 
• I'd say drop by once and experience it for yourself. It isn't horrible. 
• As long as you don't order steak, you're almost good to go. Almost.
• Plating is NOT their forte. 

That's all for now. If you're a foodie or you know anyone who is, feel free to follow this page or share it with your friends. Any form of feedback will also be appreciated. Hope you enjoyed reading. 

Photo credits and dinner companionship: Shivani Gorle

Bizarre Foods - My Top 4

I'm no Andrew Zimmern, but hey, when it comes to bizarre foods, I'm just as intrigued. In my last post, I talked about how one persons everyday meal can be considered outrageous and entirely inedible by another. That is based of course on different cultural backgrounds. But this isn't a lecture on Culture studies. Its really more of an account of the creepiest crawliest, most dangerously disgusting food items around the world. Most people say sushi is the craziest, 'ickiest' food item they've come across. If you're one of them, and you have a weak gag reflex, I would advise you not to scroll down any further.



This is the list of my top 4 'HOLY SHIT' delicacies from around the world -

 Snake Wine

Snakes are believed to possess medicinal qualities. Some people in South east Asia, mainly Vietnam and South Korea, take this information way too literally. Snake wine is consumed on a regular basis by these people - not unlike the way in which we drink regular viper-free wine, without giving it a second thought. The snake, usually venomous is placed in either rice wine, or whole grain alcohol. The ethanol destroys  the venom and the wine retains the essence of the snake itself. Some believe that snake wine can cure anything from short sightedness to rapid hair loss and that it even acts as an aphrodisiac. I know, I know. Holy shit. But there's a LOT more where that came from.

Fried Tarantula

This is something that Mr. Zimmern actually covered on his show. But seriously, look at it. It's a spider the size of the Hulk's fist. Now, fried tarantula is actually not that uncommon in Cambodia. In fact, its quite the regional delicacy. Tarantulas are sold on the streets, like in an Indian fish market, sometimes even as a roadside snack. Apparently, deep frying these creepy little creatures brings out some very amusing flavours. Crunchy on the outside and chewy on the inside, this scary little guy had no idea what was coming for him. 

Maggot Cheese

Casu Marzu, or Maggot cheese is an Italian (Sardinian) sheep's milk cheese that is deliberately infested with LIVE MAGGOTS. That's right. It is ideally consumed after the cheese has been processed through the maggots' digestive system. So basically, if I was to do some creative advertising for this foul product, I'd probably sell it as "Cheesy feces." Although ironically enough, this dairy product is considered so grotesque, it's actually illegal to produce and sell it in Italy. So there goes my career in international advertising.

Balut

Two words - Duck Fetus. I know that most of us like our eggs unfertilised (no pun intended), but in the Philippines, they like to have their cake and eat it too. Only in this case, it's not cake, but an incubated duck egg with a growing fetus in it, boiled alive. They claim that the crunch of the developing bones gives the egg a unique texture. Sometimes, chicken eggs are used as a substitute for duck eggs, but given that the latter is slightly bigger and more substantial, it is preferred over the chicken egg. I mean, I understand what they're going for nutritionally, I suppose. But it looks a little unappetising to say the least, as far as the aesthetics are concerned, don't you think? 

This isn't the only creepy culinary stuff in the market, I promise. There's always Rocky Mountain Oysters (Hint: They're not really oysters), Blood pudding and Haggis, but these are the food items that I found the most cringe - inducingly amusing. 

I sincerely hope you didn't discover this page right before dinner. 

Salmonicious

Food photography is not my forte - not even close. But when you look at even a shoddy old cell phone photo that I took of this delicious spread of smoked salmon on a toasted bagel - bed, your mouth will water. Its inevitable, so don't bother trying to fight it. 

Cafe Moshes Smoked Salmon, Dill, Chive Cream Cheese on Toasted Bagel

I stopped over at Moshes (Kemps corner) today, as a post - college food venture. When I saw this item on the menu, I was expecting a bagel covered in flaky hot-smoked COOKED salmon, but to my surprise and somewhat delight, this is what they presented me with.

Now, I'm aware that cold smoked salmon is treated almost like a delicacy in India. Not because of any high demand - short supply problems, but its really more of what people like to call an 'acquired taste.' 

I'll tell you one thing though. That's absolute rubbish. 

We live in a culture that likes its meat cooked right down to the centre. The idea of introducing our taste buds to anything out of the ordinary is not exactly... ordinary. It's not the culture that is to blame, though. People who travel and get around will understand that what one might consider as completely inedible, may be another culture's native cuisine; and while we're sticking to our chicken curry and rice, because of its familiarity, we're missing out on so many different dimensions of flavour and texture.

Anyway, back to the smoked salmon. All that salty, melt-in-the-mouth meat, finely sliced and placed on an almost perfectly toasted bagel (I say almost, because it wasn't toasted consistently enough for my taste) layered with seasoned cream cheese. Its like an explosion of flavour. Especially with the side salad - Nothing exotic. Just some iceberg lettuce in a vinaigrette dressing, that makes you subconsciously compare the two different flavours on your tongue and say "Well that's definitely an interesting twist." I have to be honest. It exceeded my expectations.  Now its got my stamp of approval, which might not mean anything now, but hopefully someday soon, it will. 

The bagel was filling enough and was followed by my usual dessert order - The Baked Philly cheesecake. Smooth, fluffy, creamy and incredibly heavy - I wonder how they get it right every single time. But more on that later. For now, I'll let you crave the smoked salmon on that bagel. We don't want to get too overwhelmed now, do we?